Tuesday was a rather down day. I saw Dr. W again. She was happy that I was still pregnant and that my blood pressure is staying stead in a good range. Chelsee from TMoTT came out to visit and bring me some magazines. Things went rather smoothly most of the day. My nurse told me that all of the nurses on the floor love me and I am one of their favorite patients. It made me feel good. I was supposed to have dinner with my hubby so I turned away my tray at 5:00. I learned at almost 8 he wouldn't be able to make it out. I was a little bit emotional. Irrationally so I know. Pregnancy hormones completely suck. I asked my nurse aid Meronica if I could have one of the sandwich boxes they send up for snacks and middle of the night admissions. She came back up here with a take out container with a big cheeseburger and fries from the grill. She said a sandwich was not going to be enough for these babies. Little things when I feel down make the biggest difference some days. I also got my room mostly packed up, because they are going to move me into a bigger room tomorrow. I sit here listening to Pandora Radio, on Casting Crowns channel again tonight. It lifts my spirits in ways not much else can. I also picked up a kindle copy of One Year Chronological Bible. I missed reading mine (it is still at home.) I had to have extra doses of the Procardia for contractions.
Wednesday Dr. S came by and wanted to start up another round of betamethazone just in case. He said after 32 weeks the main benefit from it would be less needed. It requires 48 hours from completion to be effective, this is our best window to get it in for if I had to deliver before 32 weeks. Atleast these shots do not hurt anywhere near as bad. After breakfast the moved me to a bigger room. It is one of the 2 large rooms they have on the floor. The nurses said they try and move the long term pregnant patients into these whenever possible. Sue brought my boys up to see me again, and grandma Natalie. It was a pretty good visit. They did not get my my wheelchair privileges before they had to leave, but I got them in for daily rides. After work Jerimiah came up and we had a date night over beef stroganoff (Natalie's first attempt was pretty tasty!) and some episodes of White Collar. From about 1 pm on I had horrible contractions and was on more Procardia. Jerimiah stayed the night with me. We both sleep better when we are together. Around 4 am I woke up with horrible pain, which I quickly realized was Sophia moving drastically. She went from being transverse to either breech or vertex, because I went from side to side pressure to up and down pressure. I told Jerimiah I would bet anything she is now vertex. My resolve is starting to wear thin, I am not sure how much longer I can do this and keep my sanity.
Thursday was a down day, with no visitors it was a little depressing. I saw Dr. P briefly. Everything continues to hold out the same. My blood pressures are steady. They are staying mostly 13x/8x when I have no Procardia in my system, the upper number sometimes reaching torwards 150 though. With the Procardia I am maintaining steadily at around 12x/6x on average. Before pregnancy I would be 11x/5x. I did breakdown and ask for Ambien to help me sleep. I am not sleeping very well at all here.
Friday morning I had bloodwork drawn at 5:30 AM and Dr. H came in at around 6:30. He said today was a hectic day and these girls needed to behave themselves and not cause any commotion. My MFM tech Tony came over and did the girls BPP again. He did not do a growth scan (that is scheduled next Thursday) but he did say all girls appear to be at or over 4 lbs! All of them passed, although Sophia was being a little difficult. As soon as he was ready to give up on her and try again later she started behaving! Sophia was vertex, Meredith was breech, and Penelope was transverse. Now that I let the names out let me tell you where they came from.
Our Baby Names:
Sophia Irene - Jerimiah's grandmother's name was Irene. Sophia means wisdom and Irene means peace
Penelope Ann - My grandmother's middle name was Ann and first initial P. I love the uniqueness of Penelope.
Meredith Jane - My grandmother was Mary Jane. We wanted something close, but not exact. Originally had thought Merida, but decided on Meredith
Sue brought my boys up again to see me. So thankful that she can do that. Seeing them as much as I have has helped me to hang on this long. Friday was also a day of stress. I learned that Issy has been acting out very badly at home. I know he is worried about me, but there it does not make his behavior acceptable. I hope after his visit to my dad's next week he comes back with a different attitude. I am kind of stuck in the middle since I am not there to see whats going on and I am not able to actually try and fix it. The stress of this has really took a toll on me today.
Saturday morning was filled with nightmares. Literally I had horrible nightmares where I woke up in a strange place with a woman pulling my babies out of me and taking them. In this nightmare I was also having regular labor like contractions. I woke up with those contractions totally freaking out. Dr. Be came in and saw my contractions, said just to take it easy and get extra Procardia. the contractions went from about 7-8 minutes apart to 20 after about an hour, but then I had some bleeding. Dr. S had relieved Dr. Be so he came in and checked my cervix (first time in almost 2 weeks) and let me know I am completely effaced and starting to open. He said I was not quite a full 1 yet, but I am starting to dilate. My chair and wheelchair privileges are gone and I am now confined to the bed other than bathroom breaks. The hubby was going to bring the kids up, but with everything going on we decided to just have him come up and stay the night with me. It ended up being a good evening, and he was super helpful getting me stuff and helping me get out of bed to the bathroom. We watched the movie "Lone Survivor", which was a little more graphic than I would have chosen, but it was a pretty good movie.
Sunday morning I woke up super itchy and still just not feeling well. Dr. W said it could possibly be cholestasis and wanted to do a test for bile salts to see if that is in fact what is going on. She started me on round the clock benedryl to help with the itch until the labs come back. The lab is not done in house and can take a few days. Jerimiah stayed with me until they got me the meds and then he went to go have his breakfast. I fell asleep while he was gone, so he came back up and napped too. He said it was the most sleep he had gotten since I was put in here. I know this has to be hard on him, to constantly worry what is going on and not have any control over things. He went out and got me lunch about 12 when I woke up. I fell almost right back to sleep after eating and he stayed until around 3:30. He helped set me up and get me situated before he left.
Monday I woke up extremely dizzy and with blurry vision. I had lost 4 lbs since Saturday, between lack of appetite and nausea feeling (no vomiting yet though.) My blood pressure was fine when they took it, so Dr, W said it was probably the benedryl (from 7 hours ago.) She wanted to start me on Actigal instead of benedryl. A few hours after my first dose of the Actigal I started vomiting horribly. I also tried to rush into the bathroom to be sick and got dizzy and fell. They now have me on in bed without someone else in the room to help me. It is quite frustrating to have to call someone to take me to the bathroom. Dr. H had been waiting on my liver enzymes all day and was quite upset that they didn't draw them early enough in the day. Ideally if they have to do a C-section they want to make the call early in the day so they can line up all the staff they will need. My liver enzymes crept up a small amount more, but not enough to be dangerous yet. They are going to continue to watch them closely from here out.
31 weeks now. It is hard to believe I have come this far. I still remember sitting at Duke and hearing that it would be a miracle to make it to viability (24 weeks) and that one of the babies needed to be terminated to have a successful pregnancy. It seems like so long ago. I am so happy with the choices I have made to find new doctors who are optimistic and push me to keep going. We are on a day to day basis now. The doctors are daily reviewing things to decide if today will be the day. We are hoping to hold out a few more weeks, but at the same time so ready to feel better.
